there's naked, and there's naked

Until today, I was subscribed to a bootleg music blog. That's a blog where music is discussed and free downloads are provided -- in this case, bootlegged live shows. I subscribe to a lot of these blogs, because mostly they provide out-of-print albums, mainly on vinyl, for download. As someone who bought tons of vinyl in the past, I'm pretty much just replacing what I lost. I PAID for it already -- sometimes more than once, between vinyl, cassette, and CD. Now I'm getting mp3s.

Anyway, this bootleg blog had some very interesting stuff, but the blog owner all of a sudden started putting up pictures of mostly-naked women in-between the music items, rather coyly calling them "deejays." It might not have been so obnoxious if it was just for a few days, or once a week, but a lot of them are turning up daily. On top of that, they're those horrible photoshopped and made up and fake-boobed kind of women. Anyway, I objected and so did other people, and I had an e-mail exchange with this guy, whose basic position was "naked women go with bootlegs, this site is mostly for guys, and I can put what I want on my site." I don't think I would have been so bothered if it wasn't those fake-looking women whom someone has convinced men are attractive and sexy. Fake tits and fake dyed hair are so obvious, not to mention globs of makeup. I mean, eww.

A former friend of mine, a man I was close to, once showed me a couple of magazines from his porn stash. They were magazines from the 70s, which were the years where my friend was very sexually active, and the women in the magazines had long fuzzy hair, natural breasts, very little makeup, and big hairy bushes (it's possible they also sported armpit and leg hair). I liked the fact that his taste was stuck in the 70s, and that he was attracted to relatively normal-looking women. That's a rare find, especially in New York, where every man, no matter how fat/bald/ugly, believes he "deserves" to be with a model-type.

There's a new TV show called "Hot in Cleveland" where three LA women, who are over-the-hill and just average in LA, end up spending a night in Cleveland -- airplane trouble -- and find that they are considered big-time babes. The show is a little sitcom-y, but I love the premise and also the fact that their housekeeper is Betty White, who tends to steal the show.

I've had a similar experience with midwesterners and even in upstate New York and among the hippie-folkies of New Jersey and Pennsylvania. I am a serious babe once I'm out of an urban area. They don't care about weight or makeup or big fake tits.

I once "met" a guy online and we got very friendly. He was an engineering professor from Kansas, a single father. We talked on the phone a few times, and he was a nice, regular guy, very square and very decent. He sent me a loaf of bread and a nice bunch of biscotti he had baked, as well as a picture of himself. He was pretty handsome, despite the mullet. But he wanted to see a picture of me. (I guess this was before the days of scanners and such...in fact, I did not yet have a home computer so the e-mailing all went on at work.) I was, of course, terrified to send a picture of myself, because he was cute and seemed decently in shape, and I was fat. So I sent the best picture I could find, and his response was, "a face like a china doll!" He thought I was beautiful. (He did come to New York for a conference, and brought his sons, and I spent a lot of time with all of them (as well as some private time with him). I was actually supposed to go out and visit him next, but he decided to put the brakes on, and I got all hurt and pissed off and disappointed, and that was that.)

I was lucky to find a decent man here in the city, but I had to do it with a personal ad. I'd been striking out in person for several years, because of the rampant looks-ism in New York City. At least with an ad, I had some time to talk to men on the phone before meeting face to face, so their first impression of me was not my appearance. I ran an ad that was very specific about who I was and what I wanted. I got twelve responses, talked to six guys on the phone, and met three face to face. Barry was the second one I met, and it was clear before we met that he was the frontrunner. We already liked each other a lot before we met, and it was a bonus that he was good-looking, not a requirement. (I was about 20 pounds lighter than I am now, which is not thin, but I was feeling pretty good about myself, having recently lost 30 pounds.)

I used to have a print of Titian's "Venus and the Lute Player" which I hung in my college dorm. I liked the plump, small-breasted Venus a lot. I would say to myself, "She's built just like me, and she's Venus!" I actually wasn't quite so plump then, at 17, but I thought I was. And Lord, was I flat-chested. Still am. I don't know any other woman who can be fifty or so pounds overweight and still wear an A-cup (though I rarely bother with a bra at all).

I interviewed for a job today, doing sales for the Jewish Yellow Pages. It's mostly a commission job, though if you don't make $1,800 in commissions a month, they make up the difference. Their product is a good product, and their price points and commission rates could spell good money. But the job is 9-7, five days (eek!), although it *is* walking distance from my home. They seem to want me, and I was asked to call back on Tuesday. But when I got home, I had an e-mail from the Office of Faculty Resources at NYU, and they want to interview me! So I'm seeing them on Wednesday.

I left NYU in 1998, and have applied there every time I was between jobs since around 2000. This time, I made a more serious effort and applied for about 6 or 7 jobs over a couple of days. This is the first time since I left that I was called for an interview. Faculty Resources (a new department since I left) is a good match for me, since I did a lot of faculty benefits work at the Law School. I would LOVE to go back to NYU since it's a good location, decent pay, and amazing benefits (which I didn't fully appreciate until I left there). I was the lowest management grade when I left there, but there are really no appropriate jobs for me at that level at this time. But the top three clerical levels have minimum salaries around $43K, $44K, and $46K! (Funny how for-profit Penguin pays so much less than non-profit NYU...) And there's really cheap medical, a lot of paid holidays, a very healthy vacation policy, a casual workplace, and tuition remission (which is how I finished my B.A.). NYU is a really good employer. Unless the supervisor is a total bitch, I think I want that job. Wish me luck.