Monday, May 21, 2012

love & kisses

I was a big letter-writer from around age 12 until today, and of course it is email now rather than letters.  I've written plenty of business letters, too.

Here are all of the ways I can remember ever signing my correspondence, from most to least formal:

Very truly yours
Best Regards
Best wishes
Happy holidays
Happy new year
Hope to see you soon
Hope all is well

Much love
With love
All love (& maybe more) [used for a brief time as a flirty teenager]
Love you

I purposely put a gap between the first group and the "love" ones. Is it a huge difference? how to you jump that gap?

It never occurred to me until a couple of days ago, writing an email to someone I've never met face-to-face, and who comes from a different culture to boot. We had fallen somewhat out of touch, and I do feel a lot of affection for him. After a longish email, touching on many important topics, I felt the urge to discard our customary "Regards" for "Love."  Would this send the wrong message? Often there are certain nuances missing from written correspondence: sometimes joking, teasing, or sarcasm reads as some thing hostile. So I signed "Love, (I hope it's ok to say that)". I hope it is.


I come from a huggy, kissy generation. I am a huggy, kissy girl. I hug and kiss hello and goodbye. And again, like when to sign "love" and when to sign "best regards," I don't generally consciously decide who gets hugged, who gets kissed, and who gets kissed on the lips. It's usually pretty clear. But the day after the "love" email, I saw a friend and did decide that it was time to make that move from kissing on the cheek to kissing on the lips. The "hello" startled him. The "goodbye" was a mite softer. Clearly it was the right thing to do.

Hard to figure out, sometimes, how to up the show of affection a little. And twice in two days!

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